According to a study conducted in the USA, it was found that 23 million children live in a single-parent family and a significant percentage of them are being raised by their single dads. Hence, it is not surprising if you are searching for a dating partner and suddenly encounter a single father.
Dating a single dad can be extremely rewarding and at the same time, single dads can be the red flags depending on their maturity, priority, and intentions. However, it would be best if you always remembered that dating someone with kids always brings some unique challenges in the relationship which we discussed in another article. You can click the link below and check out that article:
Also Read: 7 Best Pros And Cons Of Dating Someone With Kids
Of course, for a single dad, his kids will come first then his love life and thus you might require patience and understanding to measure your role in their family. But how do you know that dating a single dad can offer you a healthy relationship?
In every relationship, there might be some positives and some red flags that you must not ignore if you want a healthy life. Maybe you are impressed with your partner based on his kind and caring nature but he always deflects the conversation when you try to ask about the future of the relationship.
You may also find that your partner is trying to control or manipulate you in terms of how to talk or behave with his kids. These are signs that you are dating a red-flag single dad. In this article, we will discuss the potential signs of a red flag single dad and will also help you deal with the complexities and make decisions about your relationship with a single dad.
7 Signs That You Are Dating a Red Flag Single Dad:
If you know the signs of a red flag single dad and know how to deal with them, then dating a single dad can be a wholesome experience for you. Here are the top 7 signs that will help you to understand that you are dating a single dad with an explanation.
His Ex Still Haunts Him:
Any healthy relationship demands both partners to move on from their horrific past relationships completely. If your partner frequently mentions his ex either remembering her good memories or complaining about the bad memories, it could be a sign that your partner hasn’t moved away from the past relationship yet. These are some unwanted and unresolved hindrances that will prevent your relationship from progressing.
Imagine you have decided to go out for a dinner date with your single-dad partner and he takes you to his ex-wife’s favorite restaurants. Later he starts to mention the moments he and his ex-wife have spent in that restaurant and how difficult it is for him to survive after a breakup or divorce.
Occasional mention of his past life is normal and it helps to relax him to free him from the burden. But if these topics become frequent and dominate the conversation and romantic night, then it is a problem.
Explanation:
Holding onto past relationships definitely interferes with his present relationship status. If your partner hasn’t moved on from the past relationship, he might be emotionally unavailable and may struggle to focus or invest his efforts in a relationship with you. He’ll constantly try to compare you with his ex and you have to compete with his past to maintain the relationship.
He Doesn’t Consider You A Priority:
Maintaining a balance between fatherhood and dating life is sometimes very difficult for individuals. It is normal if he prioritizes his children and gives them more time and attention compared to you.
But if you find your partner constantly breaks schedules, cancels plans, and rarely puts effort into spending time with you, it might indicate that he is not dedicated or interested in you.
Imagine you have decided to go out to a romantic dinner with your partner who is a single dad but at the last minute he canceled the plan because his kids wanted to go for a movie.
Normally, kids will make such requests and it is also important to spend time with them. But when such cancellation becomes a regular and recurring pattern without any effort to reschedule it, gives a clear signal that he doesn’t consider you or your emotions as a priority.
Explanation:
Any relationship becomes successful when both partners put serious efforts into maintaining that bond. If your partner who is a single dad constantly looks down upon your feelings and sentiments, you might enter into a state of frustration and disappointment. If he is too busy with his family and kids, he still needs to manage proper time and attention for you if he really prioritizes a relationship with you.
He Is Overly Protective:
Naturally, a single dad is always protective of his children, their upbringing, and their behavior. But if he shows dominance over whether you can talk to his kids or how to behave with them, then it is a sign of red flag. Sometimes he can also dictate to you how to dress and how to talk in front of his children which indicates that he doesn’t fully believe in your cognitive ability.
Suppose, your single-dad partner is in his office and you want to go out for a movie with his kids but he doesn’t agree as he cannot be present with his kids there. Such actions indicate that your partner has a tendency to control and manipulate the relationship between you and his children which can squeeze your freedom in the relationship.
Explanation:
Any healthy relationship is built on the foundation of mutual respect, trust, and understanding. Autonomy and liberty also play important roles in any relationship because without them the relationship is similar to a master and slave bonding. When one partner tries to manipulate or control the relationship, it means either he wants to curb your role or he still cannot trust you.
He Doesn’t Want You To Meet With His Kids:
As a single father, it is very important to get his children’s approval while considering someone as their stepmother. Thus, a single dad never rushes to meet you with his children until he is satisfied that the relationship is stable and you are perfect to take care of his children. Hence, if he doesn’t allow you to meet his children, it might indicate that he thinks the relationship is not stable yet.
Suppose you have been dating a single father for a year and whenever you ask to meet his children, he ignores your request by saying they have exams or they are not at home. It shows he is not sure that this is the right time to introduce you to his children. He may be concerned about how this will impact the kids mentally to consider someone else as their stepmother.
Explanation:
Transparency and honesty are the keys to being more intentional in a romantic relationship. If your partner ignores your request to meet his children with various excuses it means he doesn’t want to include you in his family dynamics. It might show he is not yet fully committed to you and he is unsure about your role in his family.
Pressurize To Take Parental Role Soon:
In a few cases, single dads introduce their partners to kids at very early stages in their relationships. Some single dads expect their partners to take responsibility for his kids as soon as possible. He wants help from a partner because as a single father, he cannot cope with the duties and responsibilities of the children, especially when you are not ready for such huge responsibilities.
Imagine, you date a single dad only for a week and he immediately asks you to pick up his children from their school or he urges you to scold the kids when they make mistakes or misbehave like a mother. Such requests often prove to be uncomfortable for someone who just entered into a relationship with you and is not yet prepared mentally for taking a parental role very soon.
Explanation:
Relationship building is a time-consuming process that involves building trust, understanding, and empathy. If someone pushes you to take a parental role even before you build some emotional connection with him, it might indicate he only needs someone to replace his ex or someone who can help him in the upbringing of his children.
Unresolved Legal Issues:
Custody battles and legal issues often create a lot of stress and tension in the mind which results in conflicts and instability in the relationship. If your dating partner is a single dad, constantly dealing with such issues then high might be highly emotionally unstable and this will affect your relationship to a large extent.
Often revolving around the court and arguing with his ex will make your partner highly emotionally unstable and suddenly he may outburst his anger on you. This also leads to canceling various plans, doubts, and conflicts in a healthy relationship.
Explanation:
When a person is emotionally unstable, he cannot have control over his anger or feelings. Emotional connection is very important to start any conscious relationship but without emotional stability is very difficult to have. It not only puts you as a victim of his anger outburst but also a feeling of loneliness and disappointment will grasp you.
Using Kids As Excuse:
Of course, as a single father, your partner may have a lot of parental duties that sometimes overlap with his dating life. But if he often uses his children as an excuse to avoid the deepening of the relationship or addressing the potential issues that can lead to conflicts indicates that he is a red flag who doesn’t dare to face the truth.
When you ask your partner about the future of your relationship and he ignores the topic by saying he is very concerned about the studies or upbringing of his kids, probably it is his excuse to avoid your question. Of course, his children come first but when he is in a relationship with you, it is also his duty to give you proper attention and take responsibility to make the relationship successful.
Explanation:
If your partner frequently avoids serious topics and issues in relationships, it indicates he is not serious or invested in the relationship. In any relationship honest and effective communication is the key to solving any misunderstandings and issues. If your partner neglects to communicate and discuss the relationship or problems, it might be a sign that he really doesn’t care about the future of the relationship.
Dating a single dad can be red flags as well as very rewarding if you find a genuine man who cares about you and your feelings. Hence, understanding the traits of red flags will help you to find a better dating partner with whom you can dream of a better and ambitious future.
Also Read: Top 7 Benefits And Challenges of Dating Someone From Another Country
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