Following The 8 Steps You Can Start a Conscious Relationship

A conscious relationship is a type of relationship in which both partners decide to take an active part in fostering mutual understanding, growth, and emotional attachments. In this type of relationship, a deep level of understanding, empathy, and authenticity exists that makes the bond stronger. 

Start a Conscious Relationship

How is a Conscious Relationship different from a normal relationship?

A conscious relationship can be categorized by an incredible level of awareness, honesty, and active participation from each partner. Here are a few characteristics that differentiate a conscious relationship from a normal relationship. 

Transactional Attitude:

In a transactional relationship, the interactions are mainly based on individual interests or benefits. But in a conscious relationship, both partners prioritize mutual understanding, bonding, and growth over individual interests.


A normal relationship often forces couples to fall into the trap of codependency where both partners depend on each other in decision-making. A conscious relationship makes the bond very strong so that both partners can maintain their individuality and also maintain their individual as well as shared growth. 


Normal relationships can easily turn into toxic relationships due to a lack of trust and understanding. However, conscious relationships are based on the foundation of trust and understanding. Hence the bonding doesn’t become toxic easily.  

Effective Communication:

There is a lot of trust and respect between both partners and thus the communication in a conscious relationship is more open, free, effective, and honest compared to a normal relationship. The communications between conscious partners are free from fear, guilt, and judgments.


Authenticity is another important factor in a conscious relationship. Partners are often free from any kind of fear, judgment, and pressure. They can remain authentic and honest with each other as the other partners have very minimal requirements from their partners.

Key Principles of Conscious Relationship:  

There are certain keystones that are very important for the foundation of a conscious relationship.


Communication is the main pillar of the foundation of a conscious relationship. With proper and effective communication, it is easier to build trust and empathy between partners.


Partners try to understand each other from one another’s point of view and try to validate their thoughts, perspectives, and expressions, and also offer support and help when necessary.

Personal Growth:

A conscious relationship allows both partners to grow individually as well as encourage their mutual growth as a couple. Partners usually support each other’s aspirations, inspiration, and motivation during their journey creating a healthy environment to grow as a person.


Authenticity is another important aspect of a conscious relationship. A conscious relationship is free from any kind of fear, judgment, and insecurities. Partners prefer to stay honest and real to their original nature and identity in the relationship rather than showing a fake personality. Partners accept each other as they are in their real lives. 

Mutual Respect:

Mutual respect and understanding are very important in a conscious relationship as they boost confidence and trust in the relationship. When both partners respect each other’s opinions, boundaries, and personal space, it increases the mutual respect and understanding between partners. 

8 Steps to start a conscious relationship:

Starting a conscious relationship begins with a strong foundation of awareness, commitment, and respect. Here are 8 steps that will help you to start a conscious relationship with your partner:

1. The first step in creating a conscious relationship is understanding your values, desires, priorities, and areas of growth.

Raising self-awareness will also help you understand what triggers your emotions, and desires, and which type of communication style suits you.

2. From the beginning clear your intention for the relationship such as what you want or expect from that relationship.

If you are clear about your intentions, you can talk about them with your potential partners and realize if they are compatible with them.

3. Look for a partner with similar values and ideologies. If you notice how your partner communicates, resolves conflicts, and approaches future goals, it’ll give you a clear idea if he/she is suitable for you.

Of course, prioritize emotional compatibility over physical appearances. 

Key Principles of Conscious Relationship

4. As soon as you find a partner, practice an open, honest, and respectful communication to him/her.

Share your ideas, thoughts, and views with him/her and also encourage the other partner to do the same.

Practice listening to them carefully and also show empathy for their views as it’ll increase the strength of the bonding in a short time.

5. Plan for mutual growth as well as individual growth in your relationship journey.

Help and encourage each other to pursue their goals, passions, and interests.

Be open to feedback to improve and also hear those criticisms that can help you to grow your relationship. 

6. Set a clear boundary with your partner to maintain your individuality and balance in a relationship.

If both partners respect the boundary, autonomy, and their personal spaces, it’ll help to reduce the number of conflicts between partners.

7. Create an environment of authenticity in your relationship such that both partners feel safe to be their own selves.

Share your fears, insecurities, vulnerabilities, and desires openly with your partner without any fear of judgment and criticism, and also encourage your partner to do the same.

This will also boost intimacy and control misunderstandings between partners.

8. Prioritize your relationship over unnecessary things by giving your partner a healthy amount of time, energy, and effort.

Regularly talk to each other whenever possible, ask about their opinions, and celebrate important dates with each other such as birthdays, anniversaries, etc. 

Remember a conscious relationship is a continuous process that requires honest intentions, commitment, dedication, and efforts from both partners. 

Challenges in a conscious relationship with solutions:

A conscious relationship is not always a bed of roses. On the contrary, a conscious relationship must survive through many difficulties and challenges. Here we will discuss a few of the challenges with their potential solutions.

Communication Breakdown:

Over or less consciousness towards a relationship leads to misunderstanding, misinterpretation, and a feeling of ignoring among individuals. Such one-sided feelings result in a communication breakdown.


Practice active listening and giving honest feedback to your partner that will help him/her to develop. Keep time aside for your partner during your busy schedule so you can communicate and discuss any issue or concern with your partner freely and constructively.


At the beginning of a relationship, when both partners are still new to each other might face differences in opinion, moral values, and desires which can create a small-scale conflict.


Instead of trying any defensive approach, try to prove your views logically and also find a sustainable solution for both partners. Focus on the common ground, understand each other’s perspective, and use “we/us” instead of “I/me” to show your seriousness and care for the relationship.

External Factors:

External factors should not hamper your personal life but enormous work pressure often hampers family and personal lives. External factors that impact family lives include work pressure, financial issues, extramarital affairs, etc.


Prioritize self-care, and stress management to get rid of external stressors. Also, try meditation to keep yourself calm in difficult situations. Create a healthy and happy environment at your home so both partners can talk freely about their stress, concerns, and experiences and find some relaxation as well as solutions while talking to each other.

7 Tips will prevent you from being self-conscious in a relationship

Personal Growth:

Balancing between personal growth and the demands of a relationship is very difficult sometimes. Partners often get confused about what to choose between personal growth or their relationship as these two factors contradict one another.


As a couple encourage each other’s personal development and success. Spend quality time with each other and support their goals and aspirations to fulfill their individual needs and desires.

Emotional Intimacy:

Keeping emotional intimacy for a long duration is often very difficult for both partners if they don’t plan for it carefully. Thus, the divorce rate among married women reached 14.56 per 1000 married women in the USA in 2022.


Manage some time despite having a busy schedule for making emotional connections through conversations, actions, sharing experiences, and providing appreciation. Practice talking to each other freely about your concerns, issues, and insecurities, and find emotional support from your partner.

Other Factors:

Other important factors such as societal norms, cultural expectations, peers and family influences, old and bad habits, etc can also affect a relationship to a large extent.


Stick to your own social and cultural values and also respect what your partner believes (if he/she has other types of values). Comfortably talk about such external pressures, make joint decisions, and try to respect and follow them together.

7 Tips will prevent you from being self-conscious in a relationship:

Being conscious in a relationship is preferred by all partners but being very self-conscious can also harm your bonding with your partner by narrowing the space for emotional connection and intimacy. Here are 7 proven tips that will prevent you from being self-conscious in a relationship.

1. Accept yourself as you are and also embrace your partners as they are. Everyone has their individual qualities, flaws, and insecurities.

If you feel self-conscious, treat yourself with kindness and mature understanding to boost your confidence.

2. Share your feelings of self-consciousness with your partner and also seek his/her advice about it.

The more you share your problems and insecurity with your partner, the more it will help him/her to understand your problems better.

3. Try to remain in the present rather than dwelling on the past of you and your partner. Living with past experiences will only create uncertainty about your future.

4. Replace your negative thoughts with positive and realistic perspectives and validate their authority. Negative thoughts always create doubts about individual abilities and thoughts.

5. No one is perfect and every human being tends to commit mistakes. Hence, set a realistic expectation for yourself and your partner that you can fulfill without much difficulty.

Don’t compare yourself or your partner with the ideal person, instead embrace the uniqueness and individuality that the person possesses.

6. Try to engage in activities that boost your confidence in yourselves.

Whether it is doing exercise, pursuing any hobby, or spending time with mates, if it boosts your energy and positivity, then invest more time in such activities.

A confident person can easily overcome self-consciousness.

7. If you have tried everything but it doesn’t work, and self-consciousness affects every aspect of your life, it is advised to seek professional support.

Professionals can help you identify the underlying issues and also suggest strategies to cope with the issues.

Overcoming self-consciousness in a relationship can take time so be patient. Celebrating small victories, understanding your partner, and creating a strong bond with them will definitely help you to overcome the issue.

Also Read: 7 Reasons Why You Must Love Your Husband

Also Read: 7 Proven Tips For Being More Intentional In Any Relationship

About Ronald Snyman

Ronald Snyman is an experienced author, writer, and psychiatrist who has shared tips and advice to couples to solve their marital problems for over 10 years.

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